The Freedom of Forgiveness: Matthew 18:15-25 - First Sunday in Lent
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A few years ago, I visited one of our members who was living in a residential nursing care facility not too far from here.
I immediately noticed that her foot was in a cast, and I asked her what happened.
She said that she was waiting in her wheelchair outside the dining room when a male resident of substantial carriage ran over her foot with his electric wheelchair, breaking several toes.
Even though she was in terrible pain, the first words she spoke to the man, before he even realized what he’d done, were these: “I forgive you.”
There was not a hint of anger in her voice or bitterness upon her face as she spoke about what happened. It was an accident, after all, and bearing a grudge was not going to change anything.
But most people aren’t inclined to offer forgiveness so quickly and so freely as she.
If this had happened to someone else, there might have been lawsuits or disciplinary action taken against the employees at the home.
Forgiveness is not a virtue in our society. If someone does you wrong, you should make them pay. Teach them a lesson not to mess with you. Make sure they know that you’re right and they’re wrong.
If your offender has deep pockets, you could be looking at quite a hefty payday if they caused you sufficient pain and suffering. If not, then you at least have the right to treat that person as beneath you and undeserving of your kindness and respect. That’s what strong people do.
Forgiveness, on the other hand, is for the weak. And only the weak ask for forgiveness. Strong people will never admit to being wrong.
As our society becomes more divided, rage has become a national pastime. Nothing energizes a crowd quite like rage over what the other side is doing. Social media and news media are designed to feed you information that will enrage you, so that you’ll keep scrolling and keep watching. Politicians run for office not on the virtue of their fitness for the job, but on how effective they are at stirring up rage against their opponents, which ultimately leads to votes.
Do you know the expression, “an eye for an eye makes everyone blind”? If Americans don’t start practicing forgiveness towards those who commit the sin of being different, our problems will become even greater than they already are.
Forgiveness is fundamental to our faith, but I fear we imitate the world’s ideals about forgiveness more than we imitate Christ.
We ask God to heal our diseases, provide for our needs, and strengthen us through trying times—but what about your sins? Do you ask God for forgiveness as much as you ask for other things? Will you dare to ask God to expose the sin you don’t know about, Or don’t want to know about?
If you’re not taking your need for forgiveness seriously, then you’re not taking your sinfulness seriously. And you’re not taking Jesus seriously. Sin is not some minor problem that you can sweep under the rug and forget about.
We see our human disinclination towards forgiveness in Jesus’s parable about a slave of a king who forgave him a massive debt of ten thousand talents, with one talent worth more than fifteen years’ wages of an average laborer. This debt would be worth between $3-4 billion in today’s money. At the same time, that slave had a debtor who owed him one hundred denarii, equal to about a thousand dollars in today’s money. His refusal to forgive the debt owed to him proves that the king’s graciousness meant nothing to him, forgiving him a debt he could never repay.
Any sinner who seeks the forgiveness of God but withholds forgiveness from other people, no matter how sizeable the debt, is guilty of the same sin. If you deny others your forgiveness, that means Christ’s sacrifice means nothing to you.
Even so, your actions of forgiving and seeking forgiveness cannot merit you God’s forgiveness. You can only receive forgiveness as a gift. Your sin is nailed to the cross and you bear it no more. Through Christ, you are made right with God, and you can boldly approach the throne of grace to pray for God’s help in every time of need. You are free to live a life of purpose, rather than a life of shame. You are freed from the past to walk in the newness of life.
You learn how valuable God’s forgiveness is by practicing it in your own life.
Unforgiveness, grudges, and rage are like narcotics which make us feel righteous, powerful, and important—but in truth, they consume your mind, devour your soul, and imprison you in fear. You’re living your life as a perpetual victim of what other people have done or do, with no real power over your life or your destiny.
But what the world calls weakness, the Gospel calls strength—because forgiveness breaks the chains that bind you to the wrongs you’ve committed as well as the wrongs committed against you. Forgiveness is power to rise above those wrongs and do good works which heal the world, rather than adding fuel to the fire. You are choosing joy over rage. You are choosing hope over despair.
Jesus says, “forgive not seven times but seventy-seven times” because it takes a lot of effort and a lot of prayer to get it right. But it’s worth it.
Remember—forgiveness is not turning a blind eye to evil deeds. Those who do wrong must be held accountable for their actions. You must hold yourself accountable as well, and if a relationship has been broken, you must ask forgiveness even if you are certain you’ve done nothing wrong, because forgiveness isn’t about you. It’s about us. And no matter how you forgive others, you will always need God’s forgiveness more—and that forgiveness will always be there for you to receive. God does not see you for your sins. God sees you for your potential. That’s why God sets you free from your sin through the body and blood of Christ.
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