Try a Little Gentleness: Philippians 4:4-7 - Day of Pentecost
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For many years, this congregation has been a strong supporter of Bethesda Lutheran Services for Children up in Meadville. But 10 years ago, the agency was going through a kind of identity crisis.
To many, Bethesda was known as “the place where the bad kids go,” even though Bethesda began as an orphanage, and there have never been barbed wire fences or watchtowers on the campus.
At Bethesda, there’s no such thing as a bad kid…
Bethesda exists to provide troubled children with intensive education, medical treatment, counseling, and therapy—because of something they were born with, something that happened to them, or a combination of both.
Recently, Bethesda has begun a rigorous process of becoming a trauma-informed agency, which, shifts the treatment focus from “What’s wrong with you?” to “What happened to you?” After all, trauma can have a tremendous influence on a child’s physical and behavioral health. If you fail to factor in that trauma when providing treatment, you may end up making their problems far worse. You can’t treat the illness if you aren’t treating the trauma.
For those who believe that some children are rotten to the core, however, trauma-informed care will sound like nonsense.
People are so quick to assume the worst about others. We are so divided as a society that people are banding together around a shared belief that their political, religious, or racial adversaries are irredeemably bad—and are to blame for most if not all of society’s ills. Tune into certain cable news programs or televangelists and the message you’ll hear is that bad people are coming to get you. Groups of people are so frequently labeled as immoral, lazy, or unintelligent, we don’t give it a second thought—unless you’re the one being labeled.
With that in mind, Paul’s words in today’s sermon text are quite countercultural—not to mention controversial… He writes, “Let your gentleness be known to everyone. The Lord is near.”
The first challenge, of course is gentleness—which is not something you see very much of. Gentle people don’t get a lot of attention, and they don’t win many fights. The second and far greater challenge is showing gentleness to everyone.
I don’t know about you, but I can be gentle most of the time. But there are plenty of occasions, and plenty of people, for whom this is a challenge.
How many times have you been on hold with customer service, with the recorded voice repeatedly saying, “your call is important to us”? It’s easy to take out your frustration on the person who finally answers—when it’s the high-paid bigwigs who are responsible for the company’s poor service.
We all have bosses, coworkers, and neighbors who test our patience. There may be people in your life who relish in making your life miserable. Sometimes, the people who test your patience the most are also the people you love the most.
In today’s world, you may feel weak and stupid acting with gentleness—especially when loud and aggressive people keep getting their way.
But do not forget—the Lord is near! God is not absent from this troubled world. God in Jesus Christ is immersed within it. Therefore, it is not necessary for you to be abrasive or aggressive in your dealings with others. If God is for you, who can be against you? Your gentleness with others is the expression of God’s faithfulness to you.
When you show someone gentleness, you are affirming that they have value. If it’s a customer service rep or cashier who’s having a bad day, your patience may be their saving grace. You’re helping them help you. When you’re gentle with someone who isn’t gentle with you, you are showing them the ultimate in defiance.
I don’t want to know a doctor, a dentist, or healthcare professional who isn’t gentle—because you can’t heal someone without gentleness. Just the same, I don’t want to know a Christian who rejects gentleness. Jesus never said, “they will know you are Christians by your judgment.” He said, “they will know you are Christians by your love.”
The way some people behave, you may wonder if there’s any good in them at all. But it’s not up to you or me to make that judgment. If you need God’s gentleness, the neighbor needs it too—regardless of how you feel about them. If we continue to choose aggression in dealing with all our problems, we’re all in big trouble.
Gentleness does have its limits, however. We all need discipline in order to grow, and discipline is not always gentle—nor should it be. Sometimes, the only way to restrain evil is with force. Sometimes, you will need to stand up and fight for what’s right—but it must never be out of fear, rage, envy, judgment, or selfish ambition. Love must be the guiding light.
And one more thing—make sure you’re being gentle with yourself. God never meant for you to live beneath the crushing weight of guilt or shame over what you’ve done or haven’t done.
Make sure you’re opening yourself up, every day, to the gentleness of God—meditating on his life-affirming words, receiving forgiveness of sin, pouring out what’s on your mind to God. “Do not worry about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
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