"Holy Hate?" Luke 14:25-33 - Sixteenth Sunday after Pentecost

²⁵Now large crowds were traveling with [Jesus;] and he turned and said to them, ²⁶“Whoever comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, yes, and even life itself, cannot be my disciple. ²⁷Whoever does not carry the cross and follow me cannot be my disciple. ²⁸For which of you, intending to build a tower, does not first sit down and estimate the cost, to see whether he has enough to complete it? ²⁹Otherwise, when he has laid a foundation and is not able to finish, all who see it will begin to ridicule him, ³⁰saying, ‘This fellow began to build and was not able to finish.’ ³¹Or what king, going out to wage war against another king, will not sit down first and consider whether he is able with ten thousand to oppose the one who comes against him with twenty thousand? ³²If he cannot, then, while the other is still far away, he sends a delegation and asks for the terms of peace. ³³So therefore, none of you can become my disciple if you do not give up all your possessions.” (NRSV)

Stream by weejohnmurray.  Creative commons image on flickr

When I was a child, I remember accompanying my dad to McDonald’s.

Mom asked him to pick up dinner from the drive-through.

But dad parked the car—and we walked inside.  I asked him, “why aren’t we using the drive through?”

He answered, “I hate the drive through!”

I then told him that I learned in church that you’re not supposed to hate.

What goes around comes around…  I hate the drive through every bit as much as my dad.  Maybe more.  Just like I hate stink bugs, predatory loans, phone scammers, and enough things and people to fill a book.

But I cannot fathom hating my wife, my daughter, my parents, my sister, or any of the people I love. I cannot fathom giving up all my possessions.  Yet Jesus makes these very demands of us—and his words cut like a knife…

Jesus words point us to something we don’t often consider in our lives as Christians: the cost of following Jesus.

The Christian life is not a hobby or “extra-curricular activity” that can simply co-exist with all your other commitments and obligations.  The Christian life is all-consuming—and it is certain that you will get to a point where the cost is too high—and you will say “no” to Jesus in order to “say” yes to something else (or someone else). 

You will always make sacrifices for what’s most important to you.  For the sake of the rewards, you bear the cost.  And quite often, the rewards are sweet.  Love, possessions, and success are just a few of the many. 

The problem is that no matter how much you manage to get—you can never have enough.  You can sacrifice yourself to what you think will give you life, but life is exactly what it will take.

But Jesus sacrificed his life for you.  This is not a love you cannot earn.  You can only receive it—and that’s where this gets difficult.  Jesus’ love for you comes in the form of a cross.  Crosses are heavy.  To carry it, you must let go of everything else—which is impossible for you to do on your own. 

Jesus’ words absolutely drive that point home.  I can’t hate my family.  I can’t give up my possessions.  I can’t trust Jesus to work out the things that are most important to me.  I need to hold on as tight as I can—and a cross is just too much to bear.

But when you know you can’t; your sacrifices yield nothing; and the pain never stops, Jesus will. 

Jesus didn’t hate his parents.  On the contrary, he loved them very much—but when he was a boy, and his parents left the Temple, Jesus stayed behind.  He needed to be in his Father’s house.  Surely, his mother didn’t want him to die on the cross—but he did (while still loving her).

It’s all about allegiance—and who you love most.

It is a holy vocation to be a parent or a spouse, or to love and care for anyone in your life.  So pray for Jesus to teach you how to love them in him. 

So often, I love people by doing whatever is going to make them happy.  And so often, that kind of love enables dysfunction.  Jesus will help you to love them in a way that fulfills God’s will rather than hindering it.

I love the things that make my life fun, easy, and fulfilling.  So pray for Jesus to teach you how to love them less so that you can love him more.

So often, I’m exhausted because there’s so much I need to do and so many people I need to please.  So pray for Jesus to take these cares into his hands.  Let Jesus lead you to Sabbath—and teach you self-care as opposed to self-indulgence.

And when there’s bitterness and hate, pray for Jesus to relieve you of their deadly poison. 

The call to discipleship begins not by doing—but by receiving.  You receive saving grace through the most basic acts of faith: you pray and study God’s Word.  You worship regularly.  You give and forgive generously.  You sacrifice yourself for the sake of another. 

There’s one more act of faith you need to learn: that is holy hate.  This doesn’t mean you’re despising and ridding yourself of God’s gifts.  You’re simply asking God to teach you how to keep everything in your life in its proper place.  You are embracing Jesus—while entrusting to him everyone and everything you love.  It’s a sacrifice, but God’s faithfulness will be your reward.  It’s a cross that will always bear resurrection.